Proposed names to be voted on by the select few that don't have anything better to do than sit on a hair naming panel. (Panel is now accepting applications. No purchase or experience necessary. Official rules do not exist. But if you mock me behind my back, I will find you, a pair of scissors, and assist in cutting you your own pair of these crazy hair things that don't have a name.)
2. Banging Sides
3. Cheek Warmers
Is it just me, or do these names have a tinge of sexual innuendo to them? I quit. We will keep this list short. (Unlike the length of these crazy hairs that refuse to grow any more.)
Back to Lisa. So, I didn't bother to ask our mutual friend, but I bet when the mutual friend shared a home with Lisa recently, she was noticeably missing these ridiculous hairs. Damn her! Clearly, I have side burn envy. I wish my sideburns were appropriately lengthed for my head. (And darn it if the word "clearly" didn't come from Lisa.) The word "clearly," if used appropriately, can spark "spit milk through your nose" funny. Clearly, Lisa is the only person who can use it correctly. Funny, kind, perfect hair, and amazing family- that's Lisa. If you see her before I do- tell her I said "hi."
|Do you see this nonsense?|
|They are defying me. I tucked them. They don't look tucked, do they?|
|They hide when I pull the rest out of the scrunchy. You can hide, but I know where you are.|