The blog in which I share my experience in the elementary school today.

Yes, today was Duck for a Buck, and no, nothing spectacularly funny happened today, but of course, I did enjoy my time there.  I began the holiday sales push, suggesting that moms, aunts, sisters, etc. would probably love a duck for the holidays.  What a steal.  A dollar, and it can be anything from a table decoration, if it is one of the appropriately themed ducks, to a secret keeper.  Yes, you can tell it your secrets, and it is guaranteed to keep it.  There was the girl who had a buck, but had been given liberties to either spend it on my feathered friends, or on an ice cream.  I had to share the phrase, "A moment on the lips, a lifetime on the hips."  I don't think this child even had hips, and if she did, she probably wanted them fuller, as girls that age are forever unhappy with their bodies.  So...  after careful consideration, she threw the dollar bill at me and walked away with her table piece for Thanksgiving.  Her mom will be delighted, I am sure.  

Then, it was onto Charlie's classroom to do Accelerating Reader testing.  It was interesting, as I am able to see what other children are reading, and learning a little about the story through the questions.  It was not long into the testing that I was disturbed.  Among the many books, one was a young reader version of some tale of how wonderful the Pilgrims were to the Indians.  We all know how that story ended.  How generous of us to GIVE them some of their own land.  There were the numerous animal stories.  Look, there is a series of dog and cat stories that are always being checked out for testing.  After Charlie had brought home his EIGHTH one in the past so many days, I caught on.  The one about the Collie breed made sense.  Yes, we have a collie, therefore our interests are vested.  I get it.  Then, the Dalmatian, Beagle, German Shepherd, Mutt, etc., all came out of his book bag.  After reading them, I began to see a pattern.  Yes, these tests must be incredibly easy.  First, ALL dogs need food and water each day.  And yes, they all need plenty of exercise and regular grooming.  And shocker, turns out all dogs are great with kids and other pets.  (NOT TRUE)  However, this series has only one difference when you are turning the pages-  The pictures.  Whatever.  If the kids like looking at the different dogs, and show an interest in reading, I guess I should not squelch that at this point.  

Then, this one sweet child came to me with a book to test on that was so gory, disturbing, and apparently, a classic, that I was appalled that our school would carry such filth.  I am sure if I could just get the word out there to the other parents... If they were only made aware of this literature that our school is allowing small children to delve into...  There are countless other options for young minds...  And I am not even making up this question.  And the truth is, the child answered it correctly- without blinking an eye!  What have we done to our children that this answer is so numbing?   

Child got all the questions correct- including this one.  Tsk, tsk.

I am officially done with fairy tales.  The lies are endless. From a pair of shoes that can change our lives, to becoming intimate with an amphibian and it's transformation into a prince.  The only thing I know that can happen is that it can go from a fish like state to a land, hopping animal.  Lies.   All lies.   As for that old lady- I am not letting my children out of my sight near the widows this coming Halloween night.  Just saying'.